A Prayer for Discernment: Eddie Long Deserves Grace

According to Sam Reynold's, an astrologer and one of my great Twitter buddies, Eddie Long is experiencing his "Saturn Return". I asked Sam what that meant and if it was along the lines of "what goes around comes around?" and he said "Yes."

Naturally, this led me to the film, "Boomerang", in which Eddie Murphy plays "Marcus", a consummate ladies' man who thinks he's above reproach until "Jacqueline", a character played by Robin Givens, puts it on him and flips the gendered script (i.e. engaging in powerful, skilled, sexual encounters detached from a particular type of needy emotionalism often characteristically depicted of women).

One of the most hilarious scenes in what is now a cult classic is that between actors Eddie Murphy and Grace Jones, who plays "Strange`", an outrageously exotic, outspoken and wholly inappropriate artist, let alone spokesperson for a corporate product of any sort. In this interaction, however, her interests are far more personal.

Here, she is a sexual predator (which brings us to "Bishop" Eddie Long) and a keen observer of human behavior with a strong radar for homosexuals, a skill possession known as possessiong "gaydar" (which brings us to the New Birth congregation). By all means, observe the scene and do pardon the vulgarity:

You see the way she was able to stand up and point out the gay men---and without being homophobic (indeed, she knows because her brother is gay)? This is the sharp level of discernment I pray for the congregation of New Birth to possess---and swiftly.

Now, you might be saying to yourself, "But Dr. Goddess, that was a comedy". Oh, I agree. But so is Eddie Long's lacefront jheri curl wig and so were last Sunday's two services at New Birth. Like all great theater, there was great comedy and tragedy to be had (hence the two masks which most often symbolize the substance of great theater).

I do theater. I'm a playwright, I teach African American Theater and I grew up on one of the best playwrights this world has yet witnessed---August Wilson. So, let's do this.

The comedy began with my sheer excitement to attend church at 8:00a.m. on a Sunday morning. I was going to ask, "Who does that?" but Eddie Long made it clear they do it every Sunday at New Birth. Alrighty then, Praise the Lawd and Pass the Collection Plate for Legal Fees!

Why do I think Eddie Long is guilty of being a sexual predator and engaging in sexual coercion?

Yes, this is a lace-front, jheri curl wig I'm wearing and you still believe! Praise Him!

Perhaps it's the observations I made during my girlhood, while walking home in my Catholic school uniform with girls whom, like me, had conclave chest and bore no resemblance to Britney Spears' "Hit Me Baby One More Time" video, while older men would gaze upon us and catcall something akin to "Pigmeat"(and other such names recounted in Toni Morrison's The Bluest Eye).

Or, perhaps it's because I have watched every episode of "To Catch a Predator," hosted by Chris Hansen, and witnessed everyone from school teachers to Jewish rabbi's seeking out young men and women to prey upon online, even after they discover that their sexual interests are underage (usually 12 - 14 years old).

Or perhaps it's the Senator Larry E. Craigs or the Ted Haggards of the world, who vociferously denounce and engage in heavy activism against homosexuality, in particular, only to be revealed as closeted homosexuals shortly thereafter.

Or perhaps its the Jim McGreevys of the world (former Governor of New Jersey), who know good and well they have homosexual urges and tendencies but via their narcissism and self-hate, think it's okay to marry a heterosexual woman to be their beard, so they can either obtain or maintain a particular lifestyle better suited to their sense of entitlement and exploitation.

Or perhaps its the Jonathan Plummers of the world, who marry rich, famous, heterosexual Black women like Terry McMillan, as a way to "get rich or die tryin'" in America. I'm glad McMillan is "Getting to Happy" but she could have used some of Grace Jones' discernment as well. I believe Jonathan was gay while he was still living as a young resort employee in Jamaica. And I believe this is precisely why he was so incredibly attentive and loving to his wife. But as she said to Oprah Winfrey upon appearing on her show five years after 'the confrontation' with Plummer, "love is blind," so... I'm not judging, just praying...

And speaking of Oprah Winfrey, perhaps I think Eddie Long is guilty because as recent as February 5 and April 26, 2010, Oprah showcased child sexual predators talking to adults about how they seduce children, explored common traits of sexual predators and discussed why adults should pay closer attention to child and adolescent behavior. Did we somehow think that because, in this particular episode, Oprah showcased white men, that we don't have child sexual predators in the Black community? Or perhaps we found it more comfortable to rest on our laurels while the Catholic Church caught hell from every direction? Child, please. No, really... child. please.

Sexual predators come in every race, color, creed, class and sexual orientation. Believe that!

So, I suppose there are so many reasons why I believe Eddie Long is guilty. What amazes me, however, is that so many otherwise intelligent African American men and women will not even allow themselves the possibility that Eddie Long is neither "bishop" nor "prophet" nor "saint" but a stone cold sinner; and one who did not just "fall down" Donnie Clurkin style but whom does not have the character, gumption or wherewithal as a man to admit that he tried to "father" his own sex slaves by having them call him "Daddy" and creating a covenant to enter into and maintain a sexual relationship with his "Spiritual Sons".

Hence, in my disgust (and necessary amusement---humor is how I cope with the ridiculous), I provided a translation of Eddie Long's "sermon" to his sheep congregation, if only to help others understand how religious rhetoric and coded language oft times go hand-in-hand, in the only manner that I could. I live-tweeted both church services at New Birth in such detail that some tweeters thought I was there in Atlanta. Ah, technology, gotta love it...behold, the hilarity of my entire Twitter Timeline. Anything in quotes is my own translation from one of the Pastors (be it Eddie, Bernice or a Junior), the rest are contributions from the great minds on Twitter:

Scroll Down and read from the Bottom Up (That's how Twitter works)


Yep. Now, That's Church...and I'm Shaking My Head.

# Now that's church... RT @RayBeckerman: "Khawuleza" Miriam Makeba 1966 http://bit.ly/9CKmkm Sun Sep 26 13:38:34 2010 via ÜberTwitter

LMAO! RT @eddielongstroke: LongFellows Youth Academy AKA Tenderonis for Jesus. #praise Sun Sep 26 13:38:03 2010 via ÜberTwitter

I suppose it would help if we understood that ALL religions begin as cults... all of them, so when you recognize the behavior... *shrug* Sun Sep 26 13:18:00 2010 via TweetDeck

LOL!! Girl, he changed clothes & was like "get im!" RT @myexpresslane: ROFL @ drgoddess "It was #EddieLong" I can't with you....bwhahahahaha Sun Sep 26 13:17:30 2010 via TweetDeck

Thank you! I do my best! *curtsy* RT @Checkandmate: I truly like your irreverent, humorous, unblinking lambasting of that farce of a sermon. Sun Sep 26 13:16:33 2010 via TweetDeck

LMAO!!!! RT @LoveMySkip: We got praise wigs and denial wigs y'all!!!!!! RT @elledub_1920: @areefuhstanklin I'm calling it a denial wig. Sun Sep 26 13:16:00 2010 via TweetDeck

@chasi863 And look at how New Birth is ready to die on the cross for #EddieLong. The comparison is more than fair, actually... Sun Sep 26 13:15:34 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to chasi863

@chasi863 The Peoples' Temple had a high degree of communalism and love flowing amongst the congregants. They were true Believers... Sun Sep 26 13:15:01 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to chasi863

@chasi863 All of that manipulation & ideology is the same. And in Jim Jones's case "the media" & "gov't" became the enemy, too... Sun Sep 26 13:14:24 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to chasi863

@chasi863 The characteristics of theater, manipulation, exploitation, hierarchy that doesn't follow the same rules, group sacrifice.. Sun Sep 26 13:13:53 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to chasi863

@chasi863 I can explain this in full later but ppl have alot of misconceptions about Jim Jones. These megachurches are ALOT like his church. Sun Sep 26 13:13:08 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to chasi863

RT @chasi863: I could be wrong 4 this..but this sounds like jim jones and the peoples temple. All I have to say is DONT DRINK THE KOOL AID!! Sun Sep 26 13:12:33 2010 via TweetDeck

Now, that's sayin' ALOT, Miss Reefuh! Whew! they wore even you out! SMH. RT @areefuhstanklin: Girl, even I can't approve of that foolery. Sun Sep 26 13:12:00 2010 via TweetDeck

It was #EddieLong RT @blogdiva: this image right here is gold RT SMH. RT @jelani9: A short black man in an extremely outspoken suit Sun Sep 26 13:11:26 2010 via TweetDeck

Yes she is!! RT @ndcollier: And @profblmkelley is doing a fabulous job discussing the horrors of such behavior (kicking folks out). @jelani9 Sun Sep 26 13:11:04 2010 via TweetDeck

@bomani_jones @jamesdillard LOL!!! I have never seen that but the idea is QUITE funny... Sun Sep 26 13:10:26 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to bomani_jones

RT @bomani_jones: RT @jamesdillard: In Pittsburgh, people wear their Steelers jerseys to church. Its not irreverent, its their Sunday Best. Sun Sep 26 13:09:55 2010 via TweetDeck

RT @eddielongstroke: Pastor doesn't molest, he seduces. Jesus be the age of consent! #praisethelaw(d) Sun Sep 26 13:08:27 2010 via TweetDeck

SMH. RT @jelani9: A short black man in an extremely outspoken suit accused me of lying about being media..armed security took me outside. Sun Sep 26 13:07:58 2010 via TweetDeck

See? RT @jelani9: Security approached me near the end of the event, (falsely) accused me of lying about why I was there and kicked me out. Sun Sep 26 13:05:50 2010 via TweetDeck

Her, too! LOL! RT @fannielouwho: I had a righteous commitment. I hope y'all got this same love for me... I wanna walk into the light, too! Sun Sep 26 12:52:18 2010 via TweetDeck

LMAO!!!! This Twitter account is off the chain. I can't take it!!! AAHAHAHAHAH!! RT @eddielongstroke: I rebuke me in the name of Jesus! Sun Sep 26 12:51:44 2010 via TweetDeck

The choir competition? At New Birth, of course! Chile... and it's FREE, too... lawd...RT @MGhasspoken: Where? Sun Sep 26 12:46:49 2010 via TweetDeck

@girly1121 Truth be told, it will be #EddieLong's congregation that will come out in droves. They need the distraction. #priorities Sun Sep 26 12:45:30 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to girly1121

Indeed! RT @girly1121: All of u on Twitter and Facebook talking about #EddieLong better be at the polls on election day!!! #priorities Sun Sep 26 12:45:01 2010 via TweetDeck

The only person I can think of who MIGHT approve of #EddieLong's praise wig is @areefuhstanklin ... Hmmm... *scratches chin* lol Sun Sep 26 12:44:43 2010 via TweetDeck

LOL!!!! I hope we're not all going to hell... in a handbasket... or in #EddieLong's wig. RT @wizardofoz321: *falls off a cliff* Sun Sep 26 12:44:01 2010 via TweetDeck

I just realized that those invested in hypermasculinity in the church have just caught up with Gangster Rap. Who's more paid, btw? Sun Sep 26 12:43:09 2010 via TweetDeck

"There is a choir competition sponsored by the 100 Black Men at 4 o'clock, it's a free event so come back if you'd like to. Amen? Amen" SMH. Sun Sep 26 12:42:20 2010 via TweetDeck

Yes, with recent additions for what could work BETTER at 11am. RT @Choqlate: Well of course the 8am show is the same as the 11am show... Sun Sep 26 12:41:37 2010 via TweetDeck

AHAHAHAAH!!! I want him to do time just to face the truth of his bald head, alone. RT @LoveMySkip: not with that s-curl wig he ain't. Sun Sep 26 12:40:56 2010 via TweetDeck

I love her for her witnessing!! RT @BlackElleWoods: Yeah, she's in New Birth right now, so that's a 1st hand account. Sun Sep 26 12:39:57 2010 via TweetDeck

LMAO! I am crying laughing. I never thought Twitter could out-do group television but we just did w/group church. RT @LoveMySkip: *muerte* Sun Sep 26 12:39:07 2010 via TweetDeck

"Maybe you thought you came to hear a man make a confession but actually it's your turn to make a confession..." SMH---the Junior Pastor Sun Sep 26 12:36:27 2010 via TweetDeck

By the way, the choir broke out into "God is an awesome God". They do be jammin' up in New Birth. Yes, Lawd, Yes, Lawd... SMH... Sun Sep 26 12:35:52 2010 via TweetDeck


Amen Corner

Yes, he did! Those are all direct quotes. After that, I add my own spin. SMH. RT @DJ_RideMyStache: WTF? He actually SAID that? Sun Sep 26 12:35:22 2010 via TweetDeck

LMAO! NOO! RT @BlackElleWoods: you see this? RT @indigochic5: Someone yelled out we wanna know the truth and got ran out of the Church!!!!! Sun Sep 26 12:34:34 2010 via TweetDeck

Wow, he said the SAME five rocks analogy AND threw the mic down in the same way, grabbed his wife & ran up the aisle. SMH... #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 12:34:00 2010 via TweetDeck

"I feel like Goliath, David, rather, facing Goliath" ---#EddieLong No, you said it right the first time, you power abuser. Sun Sep 26 12:33:30 2010 via TweetDeck

"As you know, there are accusations and attacks made against me... and I am going to vigorously fight all of them". Cuz I can't be broke. Sun Sep 26 12:32:34 2010 via TweetDeck

He said curse, nurse, rehearse OR reverse. You know he rhymes! SMH... LOL! RT @Choqlate: I think he said "reverse it," not "rehearse it." Sun Sep 26 12:32:02 2010 via TweetDeck

"I have never portrayed myself as a perfect man; but I am not the person they are portraying in the media". I am MORE handsome! #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 12:31:24 2010 via TweetDeck

"The painful situation that I find myself and my church in..." Cuz we're all in this together, right, #EddieLong SMH Sun Sep 26 12:30:46 2010 via TweetDeck

"They shall walk and not faint" -- Cuz on Twitter they been faintin' all morning at New Birth. #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 12:29:50 2010 via TweetDeck

"We must not forget our strength is not in man, is not in #EddieLong but the Lord" --- cuz I'm guilty as sin and I need y'all to prepare. Sun Sep 26 12:29:14 2010 via TweetDeck

This is the 2nd time in 1 week that somebody used the alphabet for words of encouragement. Sesame Street would love the Black Church. Sun Sep 26 12:28:30 2010 via TweetDeck

"God would come in the midst of us... and touch folk" --Basically, that's a confession from #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 12:27:57 2010 via TweetDeck

AHAHAH!!! RT @Checkandmate: Bishop Eddie Long says I've got #5Rocks - DEA to raid church. News at 11 Sun Sep 26 12:27:33 2010 via TweetDeck

Please do. I don't own a Bentley, I have a broke down Honda hooptie. RT @JaneBozarth: Excuse me while I go write @drgoddess into my will. Sun Sep 26 12:27:13 2010 via TweetDeck

This is deep. Many aspects of his 11am sermon are different from his 8am sermon. This is a psychologist's playground. Sun Sep 26 12:26:38 2010 via TweetDeck

"We can make it through these tough times if WE stay focused on the spiritual things that have brought us thus far" ---Stay out of court. Sun Sep 26 12:26:09 2010 via TweetDeck

Not in any way, shape or form. Not one iota. RT @GreggVoss: Does any of this shock you? Because it shouldn't. Sun Sep 26 12:24:57 2010 via TweetDeck

"Or you can rehearse it...and still being beaten by what happened" --He's telling the boys not to retell their stories. SMH. #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 12:24:29 2010 via TweetDeck

"You can curse it...or nurse it... " --- I'm trying to nurse my sons to change their testimony. Please, Lawd... #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 12:23:39 2010 via TweetDeck

Or theirs... RT @LoveMySkip: whenever he started talking about tsunamis and Katrina I just KNEW that negro lost his fucking mind. Sun Sep 26 12:22:51 2010 via TweetDeck

"You have to learn how to still be a spiritual witness" --- cuz I'm about to have state's witnesses against me and I need y'all. #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 12:22:31 2010 via TweetDeck

"The greatest pain in all of that is to love somebody who doesn't love you back" Boys, you better love me back! #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 12:21:11 2010 via TweetDeck

"There are situations of deception that brings about pain...when one has been betrayed by those that they love" Mmm-Hmm... #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 12:20:50 2010 via TweetDeck

Wow. This is a whole new low. He is scaring the church into defending him so they won't lose their sense of community. SMH. #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 12:20:07 2010 via TweetDeck

OOoohhh NOOO!!!! He done evoked Hurricane Katrina to talk about pain & church communities being washed away!! :-O #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 12:19:40 2010 via TweetDeck

"...and we are subject to taste distasteful and painful situations" Yes, #EddieLong, just long those teen boys you manipulated. SMH. Sun Sep 26 12:18:48 2010 via TweetDeck

@rolandsmartin Because the U.S. is still heavily segregated, ESPECIALLY on Sundays... Sun Sep 26 12:18:03 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to rolandsmartin

"Our purpose today is two-fold..." Absolutely, #EddieLong, you gotta get a message to your accusers to be silent. Sun Sep 26 12:16:56 2010 via TweetDeck

Alright, everybody, let's listen closely for his messages to his vict--er, accusers... Sun Sep 26 12:16:24 2010 via TweetDeck

"New Birth, y'all stay focused..." cuz I still got another spell to put on you. #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 12:15:30 2010 via TweetDeck

I Put a Spell On You…Because You're Mine

@rolandsmartin There is something to be said about this crisis, though cuz George Bush's Faith-Based Initiatives helped these mega churches. Sun Sep 26 12:15:02 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to rolandsmartin

By the way, folks, check out my new iPad! ---#EddieLong Sun Sep 26 12:13:35 2010 via TweetDeck

"I'm not leaving you if you don't leave me" --- #EddieLong Amen, Preacher, we do get the leadership we deserve SMH... Sun Sep 26 12:11:02 2010 via TweetDeck

Is it me or does #EddieLong's wife posture herself more like his mother? It's just odd. She's beautiful, so don't get me wrong but... Sun Sep 26 12:10:35 2010 via TweetDeck

"God says it. We believe it. That settles it." Oh but not in the court of law of the United States of America, #EddieLong Oh no. Sun Sep 26 12:09:28 2010 via TweetDeck

RT @bmockaveli: RT drgoddess: #EddieLong said, "I am not the man I am portrayed to be on television" -- that's what R.Kelly said!! <--MMPH! Sun Sep 26 12:06:25 2010 via TweetDeck
 
RT @Aqua174: entire speech. | Video: Bishop Eddie Long Speaks to New Birth Congregation http://t.co/8QZO5sS via @MyFoxAtlanta Sun Sep 26 12:05:56 2010 via TweetDeck
 
OMG, y'all, I CANNOT get over his lace front, jheri curl wig. I want to harm whoever even made that... Sun Sep 26 12:05:10 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Basically but even that's a bit much 4 him RT @insanityreport: so the Eddie Long translation is: "I want to come out the closet but I can't" Sun Sep 26 12:04:11 2010 via TweetDeck
 
AHAHAAH!! RT @LDaialogue: How is #BishopEddieLong "David" in the analogy of David vs. Goliath? David wasnt buffled wearing muscle shirts. Sun Sep 26 12:02:00 2010 via TweetDeck
 
EXACTLY! Same w/Gangsta Rap, imo. RT @MGhasspoken: The music was good, but that is how they draw people just like the music industry. Sun Sep 26 12:01:32 2010 via TweetDeck
 
@TheFreedomTweet AHAHAHAHAAHAHAH!!!!! #ChapelHill #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 12:00:59 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to TheFreedomTweet

 
#EddieLong said, "I am not the man I am portrayed to be on television". Well, neither am I. For ex., I'm not really invisible. Sun Sep 26 12:00:03 2010 via TweetDeck

 
Morning! Come getchu some: http://bit.ly/cRi3td RT @TheFreedomTweet: Good Morning Good People!:-) Sun Sep 26 11:59:09 2010 via TweetDeck
 
@BlackElleWoods It's listed at streamingfaith.com under "New Birth MBC" Sun Sep 26 11:57:29 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to BlackElleWoods
 
Like I said of Madea this past Thursday, if you don't see why Tyler Perry is popular after watching New Birth, you're not watching. Sun Sep 26 11:56:31 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Right. At the end of the day, that's why everybody's there. Big concert. RT @elledub_1920: you gotta admit the music is on point #doe Sun Sep 26 11:55:33 2010 via TweetDeck
 
& debit RT @DoktaDivah: While I don't think prosperity is bad in and of itself..I thought the ultimate goal was a deeper relationship w/God? Sun Sep 26 11:55:06 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Exactly. RT @sjean70: also growing up it was an alien concept to us that preachers go paid. my dad had a full time job and a church. Sun Sep 26 11:54:15 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Yes.. RT @sjean70: I have this discussion re prosperity ministry with actual prosperity ministers ... they're justifications are amazing ... Sun Sep 26 11:53:58 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Girl, yes, if I was a King sibling, I'd be fighting, too. RT @aaw1976: he's the king.....smh King children come get your sister. smdh Sun Sep 26 11:53:15 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Come getchu this blessing! lol http://bit.ly/cQkPuN @BlackElleWoods: Where are you watching the service? Sun Sep 26 11:52:45 2010 via TweetDeck
 

"We pray... there will be no debt for the next generation"... Bernice, all y'all gotta do is watch Suze Orman. Jesus... Sun Sep 26 11:51:29 2010 via TweetDeck
 
"As we sow this seed...we sow it, Father God, knowing that it's attached to a harvest"... LOL. Oh God... Sun Sep 26 11:50:33 2010 via TweetDeck
 
"We are a people of God...we are a corporate body, a priesthood of believers" Damn. Did Bernice just watch "Wallstreet"? Sun Sep 26 11:49:37 2010 via TweetDeck
 
"We don't fail God. We believe God's word...and contained in what we sow is a harvest" (or a Bentley, however you so define it). Sun Sep 26 11:48:09 2010 via TweetDeck

 
How's Bernice gon' tell congregants not to come before the King empty handed? LOL!!! What if I just have a can of soup? That alright? Sun Sep 26 11:47:43 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Rev. Bernice King is much more bold at 11am service than she was at 8am...cuz she wasn't sure what #EddieLong was gonna admit... Sun Sep 26 11:46:58 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Well, at least Ms. Agnes isn't fake. Cuz in the 8am service, she was crying real hard. Now she's just smiling big. Bless her heart... Sun Sep 26 11:46:24 2010 via TweetDeck
 
@sjean70 No, the fact that churches need $$ is not lost on this discussion of tithing. But you don't need my W2s or a Bentley. Sun Sep 26 11:45:03 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to sjean70
 
Yep. LOL!!!! RT @sjean70: Ppl are allowed to follow who they want and I am allowed to criticize them for it. LOL. Sun Sep 26 11:44:32 2010 via TweetDeck
 
@blogdiva And that was up on the Chicago Bull's Jumbotron screen. Ain't nothin' wrong with using technology! Don't hate! LOL! #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 11:43:16 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to blogdiva
 
Girl, please. You should have seen the Powerpoint at Savior's Day! lol RT @blogdiva: they use POWERPOINT slides in churches now? #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 11:42:45 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Yes, because if we were in South Africa doing HIV/AIDS work, there's NO WAY he could've had sex with a young man at night. None. #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 11:41:48 2010 via TweetDeck
 
RT @Noireboss1: @the previous & following verses talk about following God &exercising his rightousness in order to profit His way (not ours) Sun Sep 26 11:38:53 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Is it just me or do those chords sound strangely like Peter Gabriel's "That's Just the Way It is?" I know a good song when I hear one... Sun Sep 26 11:32:57 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Nope, live tweeting: http://bit.ly/cQkPuN @sjean70: drgoddess -- you preaching? Sun Sep 26 11:32:12 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Interesting...and sad, really but it's a cycle RT @ndcollier: Eddie Long did say that he didn't have an ideal relationship with his father. Sun Sep 26 11:31:14 2010 via TweetDeck
 
In a related note, I learned on "Larry King Live" that "Saturday Night Live" has a test audience at 8pm before they go "live" at 11:30pm Sun Sep 26 11:29:03 2010 via TweetDeck
 
I'm pretty impressed that they repeat the service to the exact song, letter & prayer at 11am that they did at 8am. Sun Sep 26 11:28:38 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Isaiah 48:17 Lord, teach me to PROFIT and lead me in the way to go? Oh. My. God... SMH... Sun Sep 26 11:27:50 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Matthew 6:33 is about casting out poverty? Really, New Birth? SMH... Sun Sep 26 11:27:18 2010 via TweetDeck

Back to Lies of Biblical Proportions, Act II, Service II


Girl, I'll NEVER forget the Voices of Inner Strength Tour! RT @BernadetteDavis: Um, drgoddess ... what story are you about to tell? Hmmm. Sun Sep 26 11:26:46 2010 via TweetDeck
 
He told everyone, "say Monneeeeeyy! Moooneeeyy!" Snatch it! Grab it! And the congregation did it. I was like :-O !!! Sun Sep 26 11:25:15 2010 via TweetDeck
 
The small church was just outside of ATL. The preacher told everyone to pray for money & had folks snatching it out of the air. Sun Sep 26 11:24:36 2010 via TweetDeck
 
And it was on that tour that I learned, once and for all, the absolute horrors of prosperity gospels, in a small & mega church... Sun Sep 26 11:23:39 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Dear Twitter.. I've been in two gospel choirs (yes, me). One was in college. For Spring Break, we went on a tour... Sun Sep 26 11:23:11 2010 via TweetDeck
 
!! RT @ndcollier: I heard & saw w/ my own ears & eyes a pastor who said if aren't tithing but wondering why you have cancer, check yourself. Sun Sep 26 11:22:41 2010 via TweetDeck
 
I have to admit, I'm pretty glad I grew up in a church where the officials take a 'vow of poverty'. Not perfect but we were all broke. lol Sun Sep 26 11:21:54 2010 via TweetDeck
 
I would put money on it that he was. So was R. Kelly... RT @elledub_1920: I also wonder if #eddielong was himself abused as a teen. Sun Sep 26 11:21:02 2010 via TweetDeck
 
@blogdiva @ashley_is @BasseyworldLive @ljoywilliams @carolynedgar You're right on time for 11am service. Click: http://bit.ly/cRi3td Sun Sep 26 11:20:40 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to blogdiva
 
RT @blunted215: If your church asks you for your W2, it's probably safe to say that "come as you are" isn't the official policy there. Sun Sep 26 11:18:27 2010 via TweetDeck
 
RT @ashley_is: @BasseyworldLive my pastor told us we needed 2 tithe AND give an offering AND contribute 2 the building fund, etc..outrageous Sun Sep 26 11:16:39 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Yes, Lawd... RT @ajc: New Birth's 11 a.m. service starting now. #BishopEddieLong Sun Sep 26 11:15:43 2010 via TweetDeck

Personal Experience in the Pews of Prosperity
 
Those of you who ONLY protest against police brutality should know what #EddieLong knows: Judges are Elected. Sun Sep 26 10:15:56 2010 via TweetDeck
 
@mdrwhitener True but for the first time, I have alot of hope for midterm elections. #EddieLong will use ANY distraction. Victory is assured Sun Sep 26 10:14:16 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to mdrwhitener
 
RT @mdrwhitener: Dear Black Twitter ~ while we are watching Eddie Long, white twitter is somewhere telling Sarah Palin she'll win in 2012. Sun Sep 26 10:13:39 2010 via TweetDeck
 
LOL!! Yes, Lawd... RT @AndreaDMorgan: Like I said, Atlanta is a small town, there are lots of skeletons to unearth.*sips coffee* @aaw1976 Sun Sep 26 10:12:47 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Right! RT @GammasWorld: Okay I've read drgoddess & others but basically he still didn't say "hell naw I didn't do it" - correct? #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 10:11:43 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Excellent point @donlemoncnn #EddieLong loves the attention and could have made that short statement ANYTIME. SMH... Sun Sep 26 10:11:03 2010 via TweetDeck
   
Okay?!!! My soul is weeping for them. I hope they weren't watching but... SMH... RT @carolynedgar: Who's standing by those young men? Sun Sep 26 09:46:43 2010 via TweetDeck
 
TEACH!!! RT @thefriendraiser: @sfreynolds yet the public is quick to say "he did it" when we see a gang member on the news... Sun Sep 26 09:45:59 2010 via TweetDeck
 
@sfreynolds So Saturn return is sort of like, you're gonna have to face your true self? What goes around comes around? Sun Sep 26 09:45:29 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to sfreynolds
 
@sfreynolds ...I wonder how many gay Black men, in particular, have been depressed, suicidal or otherwise distraught & confused cuz of him? Sun Sep 26 09:44:33 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to sfreynolds
 
@sfreynolds Oh see, Sam, not for me. He's guilty as sin for so MANY reasons. Improperly spending the money, the prosperity preaching... Sun Sep 26 09:43:27 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to sfreynolds
 
LMAO!!!! RT @emokidsloveme Umm, he threw microphone down and ran out like James Brown #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 09:42:15 2010 via TweetDeck
 
*FLATLINES* D.N.R.!!! RT @mdrwhitener: When Eddie Long dropped the mic, did someone yell 'SEXUAL CHOCOLATE!'? Sun Sep 26 09:41:27 2010 via TweetDeck
 
LMAO!!!! We are so wrong. And yet so right. RT @Kiratiana: I'm skipping my own church for Church with Bishop Eddie Long...this is a TRIP!!! Sun Sep 26 09:40:42 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Dear God, you know I don't ask for much; but please deliver this New Birth church into the light of truth. Cuz I'm SMH. Sun Sep 26 09:39:41 2010 via TweetDeck
 
@DarthJaeda New Birth is named *in the suit* because the men said the upper administration not only knew about it but set it all up..so, yes Sun Sep 26 09:38:39 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to DarthJaeda
 
RT @DarthJaeda: If he goes down, a lot of ppl in the corpo-er, church, are gonna have to answer some questions. This wasn't done in a vacuum Sun Sep 26 09:38:06 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Yes he DID!!! LMAO!! RT @dumilewis: @ndcollier that dude ran. he grabbed Vaness like he was running for first down and was out. Sun Sep 26 09:37:10 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Pls explain. RT @sfreynolds: ..technically, #EddieLong has no victims. He has accusers. This trial will be his Saturn Return. @SaturnSisters Sun Sep 26 09:36:30 2010 via TweetDeck
 
THAT is what Cadillac Kim was talking about! LOL!!! RT @myexpresslane: I just said what the hell is on his head...*grabs glasses* Sun Sep 26 09:35:36 2010 via TweetDeck
 
They did. RT @DarthJaeda: he can't possibly have had these relationships, using church funds, without SOMEBODY seeing the outgoing funds. Sun Sep 26 09:34:44 2010 via TweetDeck
 

@ajc I am, however, the man lookin' TOO FIERCE in those pictures I sent. Yes, indeed... #BishopEddieLong Sun Sep 26 09:34:27 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to ajc
 
RT @ajc: "I have never in my life portrayed myself as a perfect man. But I am not the man who is being portrayed on the television." Sun Sep 26 09:33:35 2010 via TweetDeck

 
I can't WAIT to hear @caddykim 's reaction to this morning's sermon... #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 09:33:11 2010 via TweetDeck
 
LMAO!!! Yes! RT @sfreynolds: "Our strength is not in man, but in the Lord." I think he's been listening to Cadillac Kim! #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 09:32:32 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Lemme tell y'all, #EddieLong just further enraged some of his victims. The lawyer's gonna get 30 MORE calls from diff men today. Sun Sep 26 09:32:04 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Yes, he is, girl! I know FoxTV is so damn mad! LMAO!!! RT @girly1121: #EddieLong is not trying to throw the election season into his mess!!! Sun Sep 26 09:31:03 2010 via TweetDeck
 

"You're not here by coincidence...there's a purpose for your life" (Um, yeah, I came cuz of the controversy... LOL). #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 09:30:22 2010 via TweetDeck

"And there's a period behind that. We stand by our pastor, period." (Now please make another donation). #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 09:29:44 2010 via TweetDeck

 
Those five rocks he ain't used? He's lettin' ERRYBODY know if he goes down, he's takin' the whole DL gospel community w/him! #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 09:28:49 2010 via TweetDeck
 
LMAO!!! Why on Earth would he wear a lace front jheri curl?! What the hell???! RT @Rena_Morris: It's a lace front wig he's wearing Sun Sep 26 09:27:40 2010 via TweetDeck
 
LMAO!!! RT @pointblank009: The only New Birth I listen to is the funk band from the 70's. For long it's "Time to Go." Sun Sep 26 09:26:42 2010 via TweetDeck
 
THIS!!! You said it, Sis! RT @swannsong: We are witnessing the ultimate seduction. Salvation thru me ~~> #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 09:25:44 2010 via TweetDeck
 

"I feel like David against Goliath but I'll tell you what...I've got five rocks & I haven't used one yet" (if I go down, we all is) #Long Sun Sep 26 09:24:28 2010 via TweetDeck

 
Please hear this...'cause I'm gonna need your continued blind faith to contribute to my lawyers' fees... #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 09:23:15 2010 via TweetDeck
 
You're right... SMH... RT @esisogah: my money is on them not believing and evidence, no matter what it is Sun Sep 26 09:22:05 2010 via TweetDeck
 
How on EARTH can people look at this man with this jheri curl in the 21st century and still take him seriously?! #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 09:20:22 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Well, of course, #EddieLong, ain't nobody say there wasn't power among the congregants. This ain't about THEM. Sun Sep 26 09:19:30 2010 via TweetDeck
 
I know Barack Obama is mad as hell #EddieLong tried to use his good name as a distraction in his shenanigans. SMH. Sun Sep 26 09:18:48 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Or you can BUY it and try to settle this lawsuit with money so these boys will go away and stop hatin' on my polyandry... #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 09:16:09 2010 via TweetDeck
 

"Deception, when one has been betrayed by those whom they loved" (that's a shout to the men to be silent)... #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 09:15:11 2010 via TweetDeck

 
AHAHAHAHA!!!! RT @DoktaDivah: I'm mad yall got me glued to my phone right now...let me go feed my children. Sun Sep 26 09:14:03 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Preach! His lies are just... SMH. RT @aaw1976: The sad thing is he still has not humbled himself. That bravado is gonna be the end of him. Sun Sep 26 09:13:52 2010 via TweetDeck
 
RT @fannielouwho: Life is definitely filled w/painful situations. When I got beaten in that jail until my legs went numb, that was painful. Sun Sep 26 09:13:12 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Don't mind me, the man behind the curtain, keep focusing on Oz! #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 09:11:23 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Of course you would use your Bible today, #EddieLong, you used it during the "sexual covenant" ceremony with the boys, too, right? Sun Sep 26 09:10:16 2010 via TweetDeck
 
On a REAL serious note, this congregation is going to be SO hurt when they are faced with the evidence. SMH... cuz he's STILL lyin'... Sun Sep 26 09:09:15 2010 via TweetDeck
 
MT @sfreynolds: Keywords 2 expect 2 hear in today's New Birth service: faithfulness, trust, authority, service, perseverance, steadfastness Sun Sep 26 09:08:29 2010 via TweetDeck
 
By the way, I can speak openly to y'all but I'ma need to READ this next statement---from my lawyer. #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 09:07:43 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Dag, #EddieLong said he'll be in the pulpit next week. Alright, next week don't go cuz lightning is gonna strike... SMH. Sun Sep 26 09:06:55 2010 via TweetDeck
 
I'm not so sure when it comes to you, that a "loving" congregation is the adjective I'd use but... Sun Sep 26 09:06:27 2010 via TweetDeck
 

"Good Morning to all our OTHER guests"---Oh, like this is OUR fault, #EddieLong? SMH... Sun Sep 26 09:04:24 2010 via TweetDeck

 
Every hero needs a soundtrack. Every hero needs a live band. I learned that from "I'm Gonna Git You Sucka". SMH. #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 09:03:40 2010 via TweetDeck
 
He's the Wizard

LMAO!!! RT @fannielouwho: I used to try to get my hair like that... it didn't quite work...I see it still doesn't... Sun Sep 26 09:02:54 2010 via TweetDeck 

Anointed, my Sister. ANOINTED... LOL!!! RT @randomjeweler: drgoddess *is annoyed somehow* Sun Sep 26 09:01:38 2010 via TweetDeck
 
What's wrong, #EddieLong, no flashy suit or tie today? SMH... Sun Sep 26 09:01:09 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Now y'all know $40,000 is a good down payment on #EddieLong's next Bentley... Sun Sep 26 09:00:27 2010 via TweetDeck
 
It looks like there's about 8,000 people in this room. Now if each of y'all gave just $5, we'd be blessed with $40,000 #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 08:59:54 2010 via TweetDeck
 
RT @fannielouwho: Yes, I had to press my way through many-a-crowd, especially during the Democratic National Convention. SMH... Sun Sep 26 08:58:39 2010 via TweetDeck
 
LOL @fannielouwho RT @EbonyStarr55: OMG! When I looked up and saw that name I thought I would die laughing...whew...I can't with y'all! lol Sun Sep 26 08:58:21 2010 via TweetDeck
 
AHAHAHAHAAHA!!!! Oh my, Oh my... RT @Inkognegro: Cancer...rooted in bitterness? Bone Disease rooted in envy? gotta be a metaphor. Sun Sep 26 08:55:25 2010 via TweetDeck
 
RT @Dawnavette: So clearly all of ATL had the same idea as moi. We're STiLL waiting in a stand-still line & cars. Keep. Coming. Sun Sep 26 08:55:03 2010 via TweetDeck
 
@EbonyStarr55 AHAHAHAHAHA!!! I knew you would love that, Eb! LOL! Sun Sep 26 08:54:40 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to EbonyStarr55
 
Y'all done upset the spirit of Fannie Lou Hamer. She's live tweeting, too! #FF @fannielouwho LOL! #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 08:53:15 2010 via TweetDeck
 
LMAO! Thanks! RT @DoktaDivah: @TheCubicleChick Yep! Follow @drgoddess and you won't need it, tho. I'm on my phone and totally up to speed. Sun Sep 26 08:52:22 2010 via TweetDeck
 
RT @kismet4: woke up 2 find @drgoddess & @jelani9 live tweeting New Birth's service (ATL) #EddieLong #troubleinmind #wadeinthewaterofscandal Sun Sep 26 08:51:59 2010 via TweetDeck
 
LOL! Followup on those health prayers RT @DryerBuzz: somebody might need to explain the baptist format and why everybody running down front Sun Sep 26 08:51:23 2010 via TweetDeck
 
RT @fannielouwho: I used to lead people into singing like this, so I can relate... Bless their hearts, music does soothe the savage beast... Sun Sep 26 08:50:41 2010 via TweetDeck
 
RT @fannielouwho: All I'm gonna say is I hope y'all are this excited about MY resurrection... albeit as a statue but still... #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 08:49:59 2010 via TweetDeck
 
RT @fannielouwho: This is a trip. See, I worked as a sharecropper so I don't know what riches other than one's character God requires... Sun Sep 26 08:49:35 2010 via TweetDeck
 
LMAO!!! RT @fannielouwho: What? That wasn't enough for y'all?... Sun Sep 26 08:45:52 2010 via TweetDeck
 
RT @fannielouwho: I didn't get this kind of turnout when I was trying to recruit y'all to vote and I was singing "This Little Light of Mine" Sun Sep 26 08:44:58 2010 via TweetDeck
 
RT @fannielouwho: Well, Good Morning... Now, see, I am sick and tired of this nonsense right here this mornin'... I can sing gospel, TOO nah Sun Sep 26 08:44:36 2010 via TweetDeck
 
"It comes in the silence of those who have stood up to testify against our King... it comes in denial..." <-- that's me... Sun Sep 26 08:43:28 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Dear Twitter, aren't y'all glad we dissected Rev. Bernice King's prosperity preaching shenanigans earlier this week? LOL. SMH. Sun Sep 26 08:43:06 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Um RT @taghive:the hot new tag #eddielong is most tweeted by @drgoddess, followed by @PinkCottonCEO and @CottonfieldUSA http://bit.ly/awJgqB Sun Sep 26 08:42:35 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Not really, Bernice. Y'all have 25,000 members. Even $1 each is $25,000 to South Africa. It's not hard, really. SMH... Sun Sep 26 08:42:06 2010 via TweetDeck
 

"Know that you never come before a King without a gift and we're in the presence of a King of Kings" Who? #EddieLong or Jesus? SMH Sun Sep 26 08:41:28 2010 via TweetDeck

 
Oh Lawd... here comes Bernice... to take up the offering??? I can't... I just can't... Sun Sep 26 08:41:03 2010 via TweetDeck

King's Things


LMAO!!! RT @DryerBuzz: @drgoddess for today's twitter commentary - follow @drgoddess - please have your co-pay ready if you crack a rib Sun Sep 26 08:40:07 2010 via TweetDeck
 
My Lawd, they done flew Ms. Agnes in from South Africa. How they gon' use this old lady as a prime distraction. Shame on you! Sun Sep 26 08:39:49 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Well, we know #EddieLong has a powerful prayer. He said it during the "commitment ceremony" before sex with those young men. Sun Sep 26 08:38:57 2010 via TweetDeck
 
So in other words, when we were in South Africa, we were treating AIDs, not sleeping w/each other on the DL... SMH. Sun Sep 26 08:36:13 2010 via TweetDeck
 
@EbonyStarr55 Good Morning, Honey Buns! Oh Lawd, they're putting up South Africa & HIV. Won't @luvvieig be proud! #YesLawd #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 08:35:44 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to EbonyStarr55

Sarafina!
 
Yup RT @jelani9: Sanctuary here is full,ppl on their feet in praise. Have a real sense that it won't matter what Long says today. #rideordie Sun Sep 26 08:34:51 2010 via TweetDeck
 
@tayari My feed is still up. You back up and running? Sun Sep 26 08:33:57 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to tayari
 
I know New Birth was named in the lawsuit but it's sad #EddieLong has them thinking they're all wrapped up in the charges LIKE HIM. Sun Sep 26 08:33:17 2010 via TweetDeck
 
What's the Matter, Massa? WE sick?

I am so mad at @CNN for having a "picture in picture" of New Birth in the corner. LOL!!! Sun Sep 26 08:31:48 2010 via TweetDeck
 
! RT @TB_BT: I see they are telling the guys at the altar to head back to their seats in the event not all are friends & something pops off Sun Sep 26 08:31:27 2010 via TweetDeck
 
So far, the prayers have been for #EddieLong, his family, his conquering and financial blessings & health of the congregation. SMH. Sun Sep 26 08:30:53 2010 via TweetDeck
 
I'm not even gonna say anything about these health chants. No I am not. No, I am not... SMH... Sun Sep 26 08:28:48 2010 via TweetDeck
 
LOL! RT @swannsong: I'm trying to figure out what's wrong with the caterpillar. What did the caterpillar ever do to the New Birthers? Sun Sep 26 08:28:18 2010 via TweetDeck
 
RT @Dawnavette: There was mad traffic on 285, and now the line to head into the church grounds is at a stand still. Stretches.. to Wal-Mart. Sun Sep 26 08:27:40 2010 via TweetDeck
 
"Lord, bring me into a wealthy place...he also brought them out with silver & gold" Good Lord, New Birth! Sun Sep 26 08:26:16 2010 via TweetDeck
 
"Make me rich. I am blessed going in and I am blessed going out... Jesus, you became poor...so that I might be made rich". LAWD!!!!! Sun Sep 26 08:25:13 2010 via TweetDeck
 
"Lord, teach me to profit and lead me in the way I should go..." OMG... Blasphemy, Blasphemy, Blasphemy! Sun Sep 26 08:24:42 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Not yet... OMG, they are breaking the curses against all finances, poverty & blessings. SMH. RT @tayari: my feed just went black.. yours? Sun Sep 26 08:24:18 2010 via TweetDeck
 
@JMH7694 Good Morning, no, I did not! Please let me know... Sun Sep 26 08:23:31 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to JMH7694
 
This is so sad. You just gon' pray for #EddieLong and no mention for anybody else in the church all hurt & confused? SMH... Sun Sep 26 08:22:57 2010 via TweetDeck

A Powerful Prayer… for Prosperity
 
I'm sorry but some of us ARE here to "spectate". It's not OUR faults! Sun Sep 26 08:21:46 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Follow #EddieLong and it'll give you all you need. LOL! RT @BlackGod917: please fill me in. I've been under a rock Sun Sep 26 08:19:12 2010 via TweetDeck
 
RT @jelani9: New Birth also has the uncommon status of having more male than female members. In Atlanta that's saying something. Sun Sep 26 08:18:49 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Sooo much. And it's not just that. How many died? RT @Brandale2221: My concern is the $$$... how much of the Church's tithes did he spend? Sun Sep 26 08:18:31 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Good Morning! To catch up on New Birth, watch here: http://bit.ly/cRi3td , read @jelani9 & @Dawnavette #YesLawd #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 08:15:53 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Yes, New Birth, God does comfort and does defend...are y'all singing for those young men that your pastor seduced? SMH... Sun Sep 26 08:14:43 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Me too. They SANGIN', ain't they? RT @tayari: I am watching it live. Sun Sep 26 08:13:50 2010 via TweetDeck
 
You know, I am so very thankful for #EddieLong's shenanigans; because what they're singing right now shows you the games he plays... SMH... Sun Sep 26 08:13:27 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Yep! RT @Mamita1123: Commitment and issues...O_o All this getting folk out of their minds with music so whatever he says is cool? #NoBueno Sun Sep 26 08:12:32 2010 via TweetDeck
 
That's deep... RT @TB_BT: It's interesting how the sea of men is standing at the front of the altar in an attempt to protect it I suppose. Sun Sep 26 08:11:57 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Yes Sir! RT @jelani9 just pulled up on the campus of New Birth. Maybe a hundred folk are already here, prayer groups outside the sanctuary. Sun Sep 26 08:11:30 2010 via TweetDeck

Jesus Be a Fence Around Me
 
Wait. They are singing way too hard for #EddieLong to be guilty of sexual coercion. No WAY he could do this. Sun Sep 26 08:11:14 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Dear New Birth, nobody's mad at the majority of you. We know y'all ain't do it. But your pastor and those senior "servers" did. #EddieLong Sun Sep 26 08:10:04 2010 via TweetDeck
 
@Mamita1123 @TB_BT How are they singing this hard at 8:00am? Lawd, they got COMMITMENT at New Birth, let me tell you! Sun Sep 26 08:09:30 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to Mamita1123
 
LOL!! RT @Mamita1123: Is that Sunday service or a concert? RT Thank you! RT @TB_BT: Here's the feed I'm watching: http://bit.ly/cRi3td Sun Sep 26 08:08:57 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Why didn't y'all tell me #EddieLong produced Christian Hip Hop CDs? Well, that's it, he *couldn't* have done this! No. WAY! Sun Sep 26 08:06:48 2010 via TweetDeck

The Kwah (Choir)
 
Thank you! RT @TB_BT: Here's the feed I'm watching: http://bit.ly/cRi3td Sun Sep 26 08:05:18 2010 via TweetDeck
 
Yes, indeed! We put him on the job, 2. I told Jelani he had to take one 4 the team! RT @tayari: also @jelani9 is live tweeting from inside. Sun Sep 26 08:04:38 2010 via TweetDeck
 
CNN's covering it right now but I know Fox TV is covering it too. I prefer CNN... RT @Truely_Tuli: what channel does he come on ???? Sun Sep 26 08:03:45 2010 via TweetDeck

Get Tuned In and Turned On

The Good Lawd is calling you to New Birth, that's why... RT @marcpolite: Why am I up so early? Sun Sep 26 08:00:57 2010 via TweetDeck
 
@Orcaspapa So, if we don't have time to make fun of people, we had better MAKE time to do so. It doesn't have to be "your own" per se... 8:00 AM Sep 26th via TweetDeck in reply to Orcaspapa
 
@Orcaspapa Believe it or not, comedy is extremely important and what happens on SNL actually shapes public policy and can "un-elect" ppl... 8:00 AM Sep 26th via TweetDeck in reply to Orcaspapa
 
MT @Orcaspapa: Perhaps, Intelligent black w have better things to do then make fun of their gender & race on TV for a stupid lowlife public. 7:59 AM Sep 26th via TweetDeck

Yay AJC! RT @ajc: Parishioners are already filing into New Birth to hear Bishop Eddie Long's first comments since allegations. AJC is there. 7:58 AM Sep 26th via TweetDeck
  
Good Morning, Twitter. You've got three minutes to tune in and getchu some New Birth. Let's get it... lol! #EddieLong 7:57 AM Sep 26th via TweetDeck

It's Sunday Mo(u)rning
 
Start Reading Here, Scroll Up to read the Twitter feed in proper, chronological order. The chapter headings are to keep the order of the church (or for your amusement, whichever fits).

As always, I believe in and prefer primary sources, so don't rely on my shenanigans, read the transcript or watch Eddie Long's non-denial yourself:


For the New Birth congregation, all I can do is pray that you have discernment. Your pastor looks and feels guilty as sin and you know in your hearts you really do not need a court case (that will never happen, Eddie Long is going to settle this and claim to have done it to save the church) to consider that these young men are telling the truth about having been preyed upon and manipulated.

It doesn't matter how many people you kick out of church, even if they're not journalists, nor does it matter how many private investigators Eddie Long hires to try to smear his adolescent and young adult accusers, nor does it matter how many pastors gather in the sanctuary to pray over the potential loss of their bling, spring flings or young dings, it is the meek that shall inherit the Earth and it will be New Birth's parishioners who will be paying the legal fees and settlements for Eddie Long, on behalf of the young men he helped and hurt. Like this one:

New Birth can have a bright future. It will be kind of painful to get there, however, so prepare for the "Afterbirth":

Sorry about that. But removing Eddie Long from your loins is one of the best things you can do for your church.

Amen! Praise the Law(d)! Yes, Indeed!

Jesus Be a Liberation Theology. Part One...More to Come...

To follow our continued conversations on Twitter, use the hashtag: #EddieLong